This month’s Powerful Word of the Month is Courtesy.
Many people believe that courtesy is a lost cause. Manners have been replaced by abrupt abbreviations over email and text and “can I help” has turned into “I just don’t have the time.”
But is time really a concern when it comes to courtesy? Have people just gotten lazy?
Ralph Waldo Emerson once wrote “Life is not so short but that there is always time for courtesy.”
What do you think? As teens, adults, and leaders we have to make the decision.
The children are looking to us to see if courtesy is really necessary or if they can just go, go, go without consideration for anyone else.
Are please, thank-you, you’re welcome, excuse me, pardon me, I’m sorry, and can I help really “lost causes” or, as leaders, can we revive or resuscitate them again?
This month’s Powerful Word is the secret to my success: APPRECIATION
Appreciation, to me, really measures the quality and worth of a person in which he or she gives thanks, gratitude and honor to the people in their lives and the things they have. Appreciation also determines the potential of a person’s ability to succeed and fail in life.
I reflect back at all my set backs and failures in my life and realize that there was always someone there to give me a boost to rise back up
I’ve had the great opportunity to be under great mentors and coaches who have helped me along my road to success. I’ve had a very patient and supportive single parent who sacrificed for me to keep me in the martial arts. Sure I was stubborn many times when my mom or my coaches tried to council me, but in the end I knew they were right because of their wisdom and experience.
I appreciate where I am today in my life. I am able to empower hundreds of lives through the martial arts to help men, women, and children live to their very best and reach for their goals. I am thankful for my teachers and coaches who set a great example for me to follow, because now I am a reflection of the guidance that they gave me. I honor them. I did not do it alone. I am not an island.
I learned a very important lesson when I was young from my grandmother. She once observed me in a toy store with my mom, and I put on a tantrum like you wouldn’t believe because my mom wouldn’t get me the toy I wanted. My grandmother was embarrassed for my mom, because she knew my mom was never like that when she was a child. My mom of course was livid with me. She lost her cool fast because she did not raise me to have such behavior.
So my grandmother had to pull me to the side. I knew I could not get away with such behavior. She simply said to me “Patrick, that’s enough! You are going to have to learn how to work for things from now on!” Of course, it was a little more dramatic than I’ve described. I got it when I got home. I grandmother took away all my toys that she previously gave me, because she realized I was spoiled.
That incident left an imprint in my life, because from that day on, I simply did not get what I wanted anymore, I had to earn it, even at such a young age. My mom of course could have afforded to give me anything I wanted but she held back. If wanted a toy, comic book, or even go to the movies, there were chores involved.
My mom even enrolled me in the martial arts to learn the respect I have now for others. I was not a regular student. My Sensei made me clean the training area, dressing rooms, bathrooms, and offices in the Dojo (training hall in Japanese). Day after day until I became a green belt, I realized the meaning of having work ethic. My Sensei always used to say to me, “Patrick, whenever you do something, you are putting your signature on it. You are either going to sign your name with honor or shame! So you might as well not waste your time and give your best effort!”
Because of those lessons, I am where I am today. I appreciate my Lola (this means grandmother in Filipino) and for my Sensei for teaching me this when I was young. Till this day when I visit my 95-year-old Lola in San Francisco, I still help around the house and do chores. I’m also still in touch with my Sensei, who I’ve had a father & son relationship now for the past 25 years.
I appreciate the lessons I’ve learned. Hasn’t been easy, but here I am. I have the unique and privileged position to teach this to the future generations. That’s why I’m tough on my students, because I want the best for them and their families.
I said to myself when I first started teaching the martial arts as my profession that if I could only affect one student in my life and help them achieve more than they’ve ever achieved then that effort would be worth all the pains and hardships I’ve gone through.
Thank you for taking the time to read this. I really appreciate it…
I want to express my gratitude and thanks to Dr. Robyn Silverman and Jason Silverman for their continued efforts and support in bring us the best character education program around, Powerful Words!. I am proud that Kapatid Martial Arts is a part of the Powerful Words Program, helping change the lives of the many families in our community for the better.
Gumagalang (Respectfully),
Please watch the following video with Dr. Robyn Silverman
introduce our Powerful Word of the Month: Appreciation
How are you doing so far in ‘09? I hope this month’s Powerful Word finds you in good spirit and great attitude. This month’s Powerful Word is Confidence, created by the nation’s leading Child Development Specialist, Dr. Robyn Silverman.
This is one of my favorite martial arts characteristics. If there is one thing that is the outcome of all the training and philosophy of the martial arts it’s the power to believe in yourself. Kapatid Martial Arts Academy prides ourselves in developing the confidence of all the men, women, and children that are members of our academy.
How is Confidence built? - You build up your confidence, one challenge at a time. Once you conquer or tackle a challenge and overcome it, that becomes a stepping stone or platform for you to reach for higher goals and aspirations. When you master a challenge/problem over and over again, it boosts you to see what else you can achieve.
For example, when a child who is shy and timid, and lacks the self-esteem to come to class, the solution there is to just take the first step in class. I wouldn’t throw them right away into the fire, just to see them burn… Baby steps, till they can walk on their own.
The late Martin Luther King Jr once said, “Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.“ The goal in the martial arts is to achieve the Black Belt. Now to a beginner that can be like telling you to climb Mt Everest. I’m not going to fool you by saying things will be easy. The path towards your mastery will have many twists and turns along with road blocks. You will get bumps and bruises along the way. As your coach, I am your bumper rails to keep you on the path, on track towards your personal mastery.
Who you and/or child associates with also makes a difference. Surround yourself with positive successful people, you too will be successful. Surround yourself with individuals who are confident in their abilities, you too will gain confidence in your abilities.
But if you hang out with people who are all about doom and gloom, saying things like “But what if I fail? what if things don’t workout as planned?”, you need to put yourself in check and protect yourself against those kinds of people. It’s a bully method. They will justify their attitude and behavior by telling you it’s alright not to take action, because by not taking action you can’t fail. WRONG! By not taking action, you don’t move forward either!
Just like leadership, you are not born with Confidence. It’s not built overnight, but it starts instantly with you. Make the CHOICE to live with CONFIDENCE. DECIDE NOW!
To Your Success,
PS. Here’s this month’s message from the Powerful Words creator, Dr. Robyn Silverman:
PPS. Congratulations Dr. Robyn and Jason Silverman for the birth of their adoptive daughter, Talia Paige!!!
Dr. Robyn Silverman has a powerful message for us again for the month of February. It’s Trustworthiness!
What is trust? Trust is when people are dependable, honest, and loyal. Trust is when you know you won’t want to do others wrong. You trust your parents, significant other, spouse, friends, and family. Just like Respect, Trust is earned and built. You know who you can trust based on their actions, decisions, and behavior, not just necessarily what people might say. “Actions speak louder than words”
If you can trust others, the real question is can people trust you? This entire month you will be focusing on making yourself worthy of trust… It first starts with you…
Can you believe it? 31 days down from 2009. I hope you’re up and running towards your goal that you set from the beginning of the year. These days you have to fight and go for it. Take action and work your plan…
Life seems like a rush these days. Everyday I express my gratitude for another day to make a difference in this world. I love what I do. I know I have a large responsibility on my hands, that few men would ever care for. One of my sources of inspiration is see you succeed and reach your goals, not only in the martial arts, but in all aspects of your life.
My instructor, Pamana Tuhon Sayoc, once asked me if I thought that I was successful. I asked him if that was a trick philosophical question. Tuhon said to me, “Pat, what you do on the mat, do you believe that it saves lives?” I enthusiastically replied “Yes!”
“How many lives do you think you’ve saved then over the years?”, Tuhon asked.
“Hundreds..”, I answered.
“What cost has it been to you or to those you’ve saved and influenced?” - Tuhon
“Priceless” - Guro
“Would you trade that responsibility for anything in this world?” - Tuhon
“Nothing at all” - Guro
“Then you are a man who has passion for something that he truely believes in, even though you have no obligation or attachment to do so, you do it with fervor and continually do your best. There are men who go through this life never knowing the greatness within them, their pursose and their calling. What we do saves lives…” - Tuhon
I wanted to share that with you, because I too have mentors/coaches cheering me on, reminding me of the things I know, and the things that am supposed to do. Having a coach behind me keeps me alert and hungry for my goals in life. Tell me what moves you, what inspires you. I’d love to hear from you. You can email me at info@kapatidmartialarts.com.
Happy New Year 2009! I want to greet each and every one of you a Prosperous and Healthy 2009. While others set resolutions, my feelings are that a resolution means you are a problem. I don’t think you want to start up the new year that way. Wipe a clean slate and start fresh! Goal-Setting is the solution! Make sure you get this month’s handout on Goal-Setting to share with your family and friends…
Have a Powerful Month!!!
To Your Success,
Guro Patrick Consing
Here’s a this month’s POWERFUL message from our Child Development Specialist, Dr Robyn A. Silverman:
In this day and age, I’m witnessing too much conflicts and head’s butting. How can we be accepting of each other without imposing each other’s beliefs and cultures? Here’s a video from our Character Education Specialist, Dr. Robyn Silverman….
